Finding Joy
John slipped into the back of the school for the Christmas Concert, but almost immediately I could tell something was wrong as I made my way to the back to say hello. “Hey man, good to see you!” I said as I shook his hand. John had always been outgoing and winsome, but today something was off.
“Yeah man, good to see you, too” he said with a smile that never reached his eyes as we shook hands. Almost immediately he looked away again quickly scanning the room nervously. Odd, I thought. “Your family is in the front right if you’re looking for them,” I explained. “Oh,” he said a bit embarrassed, “uh, actually, it’s not public yet but Kristin and I are separating so I’m trying to give them some space. It’s good though” he said unconvincingly, “It’s a good thing, for everybody.”
Almost as quickly as the words left his mouth, his eyes widened and he quickly followed up with, “Sorry man, that’s a lot. I didn’t mean to drop that on you. It’s just that today’s about my daughter so I think I’m just going to hang in the back here. Thanks man.” As I was about to respond, the strong smell of alcohol on his breath hit me. “No worries, man,” I replied, “It’s good to see you,” I said trying to ease his embarrassment before walking away. My heart aches for John and his family.
Today was another stark reminder of what a mixed-bag Christmas can be for any number of families. Many couples are navigating marital struggles, others have recently lost a loved one, and the ongoing challenges of everyday life can make it difficult to “enter into this Advent season.” Compounded by the tragedies playing out on the world stage the theme of “Joy” couldn’t seem further away.
How can we possibly find Joy in the midst of such heaviness and deep pain?
It's a fair question, one that oversimplified answers cause more harm than good. But my hope today is to offer a couple of considerations that could open our hearts to seeing that Joy manifests in the midst of pain, not the absence of it.
As we look at a couple of these considerations, I’ve found it’s helpful to delineate between happiness and joy.
I’m defining happiness as a fleeting emotion that is tied to external circumstances, whereas joy is a profound and lasting state of fulfillment rooted in a relationship with God.
With that definition in mind, let’s take a look at the first consideration:
First, Jesus’ birth demonstrates that God isn’t far off but meets us in the midst of our pain.
Think about a handful of deliberate circumstances chosen by God as the backdrop for the birth of the world's Savior:
An unplanned pregnancy to an unmarried woman - Jesus understands those misunderstood, those who are vulnerable, and wrongly judged
Far from majestic cathedrals and beautiful stained glass, Jesus took his first breath’s in a barn likely tainted by the pungent smell of manure - Jesus understands those who are unhoused and living in poverty
Jesus is born into a nation under Roman occupation with a King enraged with Jealousy (Herod) who kills hundreds of innocent baby boys in an attempt to murder Him - Jesus understands oppression, violence, and what it’s like to be an immigrant fleeing for His life.
This demonstrates to us that Jesus meets us in the midst of our pain. Advent - literally “coming” or “arrival” is the fulfillment of the God’s rescue plan for His kids. Since the very beginning when Adam and Eve fell into sin, we don’t discover a God that is distant with arms crossed and shaking His head in dissapointment, but rather a compassionate God that was calling out to Adam and Eve looking for them, asking, “where are you?”
Jesus birth shows us that God has launched the greatest rescue mission of all time by entering into the pain and the hardship of life in order to meet us in the midst of it all. True life is given where it is needed most.
Jesuit Priest, Paul Coutinho shares in his book “How Big Is Your God?”:
The Good News is that Jesus came to give us freedom - not freedom from suffering, sickness, and death, but freedom that we experience in suffering, in sickness, and in the face of death. Jesus never promised to get rid of suffering. He never promised to get rid of sickness. He never promised to get rid of death and dying. Jesus promised to give us the peace that the world cannot give. Jesus promised to give us the inner freedom, joy, and happiness that no one and nothing can take away from us, even in the midst of tremendous pain, suffering, sickness, and death. That is the Good News of Jesus, and that is what we see in the cross.
As it turns out, the very challenges we are facing, no matter how difficult or painful, are actually the very reason that the birth of the Savior is good news to us. It’s a clear sign to us, by God, that He isn’t distant but near. And those challenges become the very places that we are invited to experience God’s love, grace, and mercy.
Psalm 34 so articulately shares that God is our refuge and that He hears us when we cry out to Him. “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”
If you resonate with that passage, the gift of this Advent season is that God is near to those whose hearts are broken.
The birth of Jesus is God’s answer to a deeply broken world as part of His plan “to reconcile to himself all things, whether things on earth or things in heaven, by making peace through his blood, shed on the cross.” (Colossians 1:20).
This instills hope within us, because we can have confidence that God will reconcile everything in the end.
This leads us to the next consideration. One which I offer gently knowing that this topic is far greater than the reach of this short post.
The consideration that I’d invite us to be open to is this:
Pain, worked out in us, actually leads us to maturity, and completeness in our faith, and ultimately produces joy.
But how?
In the book of James, almost immediately he begins by saying:
”Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” James 1:2-4
As we journey through pain, trials, and hardship, we encounter a chance to strengthen our faith and anchor our hope in Christ. It's a choice between pulling away or drawing closer to God. Choosing the latter leads us to uncover deeper levels of trust and intimacy—found only by clinging to Jesus amidst life's storms.
We see this in the lives of seasoned saints who have navigated enormous amounts of pain. We long for that same sense of depth, wisdom, and maturity, but we don’t want to have to walk through the pain and challenges that got them there.
The uncomfortable reality is this: there is a depth of faith that only comes when we have been stripped back to nothing and discover that Jesus is still with us. Tim Keller puts it more succinctly, “You will never know that Jesus is all you need until Jesus is all you have”.
When we embrace our faith in Christ at that level of utter desolation, He becomes the very bedrock and foundation of our lives that we rebuild on. We become the house that stands the storms of life that we see in Matthew 7 because we’re built on the unmovable rock which is Christ. Anything else will crumble because literally everything else we look to for purpose, value, meaning, and stability can be taken away.
When we are grounded in this way, not only do we not have to fear trials as they come our way, but new trials actually serve as avenues to experience God’s grace, mercy, and growth.
This concept reminds me of a phenomenon in nature where wildfires, something we are painfully aware of every summer, are a necessary ingredient for the germination of certain types of trees.
“In environments where hot, fast moving fires are frequent, some pine species have developed very thick, hard cones that are literally glued shut with a strong resin. These ‘serotinous’ cones can hang on a pine tree for years, long after the enclosed seeds mature. Only when a fire sweeps through, melting the resin, do these heat-dependent cones open up, releasing seeds that are then distributed by wind and gravity.”
-National Forest Foundation
In the same way, the fire of trials has the potential to open us up to new life and potential. Perseverance does a deep formative work and plays an important role in our spiritual formation journey. This isn’t to say that God causes our pain, but rather, that He never wastes our hurts. We see this in Romans 8:28 (MSG) which reads: "That’s why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good."
This shift in thinking, James explains, can actually infuse our senseless pain with deep meaning, and purpose, and ultimately lead us to joy.
A couple of questions for reflection:
How might Jesus be inviting us to encounter Him in the midst of our pain?
As you consider your current circumstances, what do you think God wants to give you in this moment?
Where are you currently experiencing joy, and what might it look like to lean into those areas as places of connection with God in this season?
Prayer for Strength
Lord, in this time of trial and fire, we ask for your strength and guidance. Help us to remember that you are always with us, even when we feel alone. Give us the courage to face our challenges with grace and dignity, and the wisdom to know when to ask for help. We pray for the strength to persevere, even when the road ahead seems long and difficult. May we find comfort in your love and peace in your presence. Amen.
-Anonymous
